Leaving your family home to go to university is not always easy. Read the advice from a first-year student and her dad to get two points of view on the experience.

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Leaving home

Going away to university is always a tricky time, both for the students who are leaving home and their parents who are staying behind. We got advice on how to cope from a student daughter and her dad.

A daughter’s advice to parents, by Kerry Price

My parents drove me to uni at the beginning of the first term. That was great, but then they hung around, so it was hard to chat to the people in the rooms near mine. It’s best if you leave us to unpack ourselves.

Don’t ask us to come home during term time. There’s a lot going on at weekends, there just isn’t time.

Get another interest or a pet if you feel lonely without us. Don’t make us feel guilty about leaving home!

It is quite interesting to hear about your experiences at uni, but remember that it was a LONG time ago so don’t go on about it so much. Things have changed a lot. Now we have a lot more debt and it’ll be harder to find a job in the future.

Please don’t check up on us or our friends on Facebook. I know it’s a public site, but we have the right to some privacy.

Don’t change anything in our bedrooms. We have only half left home - we’ll be back in the holidays, so please don’t touch anything.

We’d still like to come on family holidays with you. Don’t forget to include us just because we’re not there all the time.

A father’s advice to students, by Stuart Price

Don’t complain so much about how much work you have to do. We work a lot too. You’re an adult now, get used to it.

Put up with the fact that we refused to get a dog while you were at home, then suddenly bought one as soon as you moved out. We miss you!

Just because you’re at university studying very complex subjects, it doesn’t mean that you’re more intelligent than everybody else. Don’t treat your family as if they were stupid; we’re really not.

Let us come and visit you now and again. We promise to try not to embarrass you in front of your friends. We just want to see you for a short time and take you out for a meal.

Don’t waste so much time on Facebook. You need time for all that work you have to do, remember?

We might make a few changes to your room, so deal with it. It’s great to have a guest room at last, but we won’t change things too much, promise.

Don’t forget to call home from time to time and don’t get annoyed if we phone you. It’s not pestering. If we didn’t call, you wouldn’t know that we care.

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Discussion

Are you looking forward to leaving home? Why or why not?

Comments

MarisolM's picture
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MarisolM 11 September, 2020 - 22:50

In my opinion I agree with Kerry's opinion it is so difficult to be independent at all. But not impossible. We don't have to forget our parents because they will be proud of us being at a university concluding our studies and they give us all the support. In the opinion of Stuart I agree with that.

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marianrg's picture
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marianrg 11 September, 2020 - 22:45

I am looking forward to moving away from home at least one year and I think that all the tips that are here are very helpfull

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Maraguirre's picture
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Maraguirre 11 September, 2020 - 22:40

Im not looking to move from my home, cause im too young and i need to learn more from life to be independent.

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alejandramr's picture
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alejandramr 11 September, 2020 - 22:39

I think that there has to be a balance because in one side, its very important to keep in touch with your family regularly so they can be sure that you are ok and safe, but in the other hand the parents have to understand that part of of their children growing and maturing process is that their daughters and sons also need some space and privacy so they can experienced new things from their own and learned from them.

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A01284811's picture
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A01284811 11 September, 2020 - 22:37

I agree with your comment because you don't know how to live alone, you need people and it is very difficult to make friends.

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Yuly 11 September, 2020 - 22:36

I am foreign student, so I could feel what Kerry felt at the university, I thing the university and the opportunity to study abroad is a really good to become independent and responsaible about our own acts. Actually leaving home is a process that all of us are going to experiment, so reading this kind of articles for me is a prediction of what could I will be feeling in a few months.

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A01284820's picture
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A01284820 11 September, 2020 - 22:31

In my personal life, I do not agree with the idea of living home to go to university because I do not want to leave my family and friends behind. I would like to go to university in a place that is near my house and when I graduate I will be independent. The thing that I do not like about leaving my family and friends is that I will only see them only for holidays or in the summer.

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fernandoag's picture
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fernandoag 11 September, 2020 - 22:29

I am looking forward to leave my home, because I want to finally leave by myself and have my own set of rules and be independent. I think I am old enough to leave home, and I'm pretty sure I'm responsible enough to live without my parents

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cesaaaarmoran's picture
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cesaaaarmoran 11 September, 2020 - 22:27

I do look forward to leaving home but not to college, maybe for a master's degree or some international experience. I feel like i'm not mature enough and maybe it sounds cool to be like by your own and you think is partying all the time and things like that. But I don't think I'm ready personally.

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a01197985's picture
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a01197985 11 September, 2020 - 22:26

Actually I am not looking to leave home because my parents are so relaxed talking about permits and that kind of things, but I will like in some years to buy my own house to being more independent.

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Storm34's picture
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Storm34 11 September, 2020 - 22:24

I think that the argument is correct, the university is the perfect time to be indpendent since theres where we can do thing alone, since when we get out of university we are know consider adults and need to foun a work to get money.
I think that starting in university is the better time.

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XavierLealLeal 11 September, 2020 - 22:21

I'm looking forward to leaving home because I can improve my life skills, for example my sloving problems skills.I will become more independent and know how to save money. Have the liberty to do what i want and not having someone to tell me what to do.

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MAPISS's picture
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MAPISS 1 August, 2020 - 19:34

Not yet, I just wanna finish high school, but maybe in some years when I'm at university the most probably is that I'll leave home.

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LopezGonzalez801's picture
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LopezGonzalez801 27 July, 2020 - 14:19

right now, i'm not looking for leave home, but maybe in the future yes because i'll have to leave home for live close to my university.

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ThanhBong's picture
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ThanhBong 10 July, 2020 - 15:57

No, I'm not. Because I don't want to leave my lovely home. I want to live with my family.

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Ngocthao60nna10's picture
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Ngocthao60nna10 28 June, 2020 - 17:59

I'm looking forward to leaving home because I can improve my life skills, for example my sloving problems skills.I will become more independent and know how to save money. I also feel like I am an adult.

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_nguyenthanhtom's picture
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_nguyenthanhtom 22 June, 2020 - 03:58

I agree you that leaving home is a big step in our life because we begin to be adults with many responsibilities. Leaving home is a big challenge for children and parents because we have to face to many difficulties but it will be a great experience. For me,leaving home make me be mature, I can deal with problems in real life and solve them by myself.

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LinhNguyen_2208's picture
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LinhNguyen_2208 21 June, 2020 - 13:18

To me, I think I am not looking forward to leaving home because I'm afraid of homesick. I and my family are extremely close-knit so I don't wanna leave my home. On the other hand, if I have to leave my home perhaps for serving my jobs or getting married far away from home, I think I still accept and think more positively. Maybe leaving home makes me more independent and stronger.

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Yennhi 21 June, 2020 - 04:27

Right now I'm living far away from home. I have my dream pursuit, I wanna get a good job in the future, so I have to effort from now. And I think independent is really important in life for an adult, you can learn to be more responsible and to value the things you get. So I believe leaving home is not bad.

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Kimthoa172's picture
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Kimthoa172 19 June, 2020 - 07:46

Personally I think leaving home to go to the university will be a good opportunity for us to experience and learn many useful skills from our lives. Although sometimes I miss my family a lot, I always try my best to develop my future!!!

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thuchien's picture
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thuchien 18 June, 2020 - 02:14

I'm looking forward to leaving home as I not only feel comfortable but also improve my life skills, for example my decision-making skills. I also feel like I am an adult. Furthermore, leaving home helps me independent, although at first I would get some troubles about finance.

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s1rko's picture
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s1rko 24 May, 2020 - 17:39

I don't care, I will feel in the new place almost the same as at home. Of course, after a long time I will start to miss home. The main thing in the new place is to find friends so that it was not so difficult to live. At least once a day to call parents so that they do not worry. And wait for the holidays to come home.

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Giovannichoi's picture
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Giovannichoi 13 April, 2020 - 08:43

Nope, I don't looking foward to leave my home fo university. I've never been aparted and devided from my parents. Even I'm not going any academies. And I feel scared and very uncomfortable when I am alone in my house or somewhere. I feel like my parents will abandon me. So, I don't want to leave my home and live departed with my parents. And when I grow up in the future,if I have to leave them, I'll NEVER forget my parents and be rude to my parents. Because they are very special people for me, like give me a birth and grow me up. I 'll always thankful to them and always don't forget the parent's day. they are mercyful and glorious. They are worth to have this attitudes.

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Elife's picture
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Elife 14 February, 2020 - 23:59

Yes, in my opinion, independence is very important in the life of a teenager, because you learn to be more responsible for yourself, and to value the things you get.

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Tamaldemole 13 February, 2020 - 18:21

I live in my own house, I have an equally own room, I have a bed and a bathroom for my needs and I have a patio

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Dannyrdz89's picture
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Dannyrdz89 21 November, 2019 - 17:11

i think that the parents are misssing they daugther and the girl wants to have some privacy, and other thing the girl is growing up and also is a thing of mature and becoming a woman.

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KeylaVazquez's picture
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KeylaVazquez 24 September, 2019 - 03:37

Like all people, I will leave my home one day with the certainty that I will miss my family. Besides that, I know that it will be a great challenge since I am not used to stay away from my comfort zone, live without my parents,take care of payments and mantain a house. Certainly, it will not be easy for my parents or me, but I am sure that we will know how to deal with that.

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A01285136's picture
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A01285136 9 October, 2019 - 16:53

You have a very good comment I think the same as you, soon we will have to leave our home and that will be very difficult but it is something we have to do, and if it will be difficult but you will get used.

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