Magazine topic: 
Science and technology

Is it acceptable to delete friends from Facebook?

by : 
IainG

This question is something that often seems to be talked about among friends. Most of my own friends think that there is nothing wrong with it, but others – including my mother – think deleting Facebook friends should be a capital offence.

I think the first real issue is whether or not our Facebook friends are our friends in real-life too. I know that many of mine are not: I never accept strangers onto my Facebook profile – or any other social network, for that matter. At the same time, though, I would not call many of my Facebook “friends” actual friends. I have many friends from school and university on Facebook, but I speak to very few of them. Many are people I have met only once, or are old colleagues. While I do know everybody, I really cannot claim that they are all my friends.

Every time I delete somebody from Facebook I think about how I would feel being deleted. I don’t have to imagine – I have been deleted by plenty of people. Before, whenever I realised that somebody had deleted me, I desperately searched to find out who it was. I’ve stopped doing that – I have learned that if I cannot work out who deleted me, they probably weren’t that important to me.

I remember when Facebook was still a new social network. Talking about deleting people was always done in hushed tones – it could not be spoken about openly, in case somebody overheard and was offended.

Now deleting “friends” is much more common, and often spoken about among friends (real-life ones, that is). People nowadays even announce on Facebook that they are about to delete a number of people. (This is, I think, to make you feel lucky if you are “saved”, but it often has the opposite effect).

At the end of the day, I think the answer to the question of deleting friends is quite simple. Friendships are not permanent. Very few relationships really are. Why, then, should Facebook “friendships” be permanent? I think we have to delete friends in order to reflect the realities of real-life relationships.

Deleting a few friends is acceptable, I think. There is one thing I do know, though: deleting your mother is not acceptable. I learned that one the hard way.

Discussion

Do you delete friends from Facebook or other social media? Have you ever been deleted?

Comments

gabrielamt99's picture
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gabrielamt99 7 November, 2014 - 18:06

Deleting facebook "friends" it's acceptable, as long as you don't talk too much with them in real life. I think i'd be disagree and confused if an actual real friend, delete me on this social network, everybody has their opinions, and we have to accept, facebook is not part of our daily living.

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Angiepu1998's picture
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Angiepu1998 7 November, 2014 - 18:06

i dont have facebook and my friends always ask me why but the reason is because i prefer to talk with other people in real life

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nbotello1's picture
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nbotello1 7 November, 2014 - 18:05

First we have to know what a friend really means, sometimes we just care about the number of friends and hardly only 80 or 50 are real friends, so i think deleting friends is not that bad and is just a social media. BUT NEVER DELETE FAMILY MEMBERS.

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aktoty_nis's picture
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aktoty_nis 30 July, 2014 - 12:10

In my country Facebook isn't very popular. The popular social media is "Vkontakte".
I think we do not need to save strangers. But some people want to find new friends. Personally, I accept only my friends !

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venkatgade10's picture
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venkatgade10 20 July, 2014 - 10:24

I deleted one of my school friend from Facebook friends list, i studied with him 4 years later i went to another school, after three years of not talking to him, i sent a message but he didn't reply even though he is in online, i tried to contact him too many times but no reply from him but i am able to see his posts on Facebook, i felt like he ignored my messages, so i deleted him from my account, hope he may understand why i deleted to him,
One of my friend deleted me, i don't know the reason for deleting me, But it's oky, i talked few times only, later i don't remember it.
What i feel, we have so many friends in our social network but we talk with few only and care for some friends so what's the point in keeping all non talking friends, but sometimes i feel keeping in my list when i see some interesting posts from them and for time pass.

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cklj's picture
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cklj 19 June, 2014 - 18:54

I delete friends from Facebook often and I don't see something wrong with that. Sometimes I feel that those people don't know me and simply don't deserve to see what I post on my profile. The people I delete are probably ones I've never spoken to.
I have been deleted. I didn't care when I found out.

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bluerock13's picture
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bluerock13 15 June, 2014 - 13:08

oh, I have facebook, but I still think it's a waste of time. I've been deleted and I don't give a damn for that :D... and yes, I delete "friends" from facebook because maybe I don't know them that much or even at all, so I don't see what could they do in my "friends" list... Personally, I think our true friends are outside facebook, but I don't exclude the idea of making real friends on facebook too. :)

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GerardG9's picture
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GerardG9 26 May, 2014 - 23:06

I think that when they delete a'' friend'' on facebook do not have to say in public that the person you are eliminating may feel offended and all the friends you have on facebook are not real.

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Khaleesi's picture
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Khaleesi 22 April, 2014 - 14:08

I don't know if someone ever deleted me, and I don't care. But I WILL delete someone if I want to. Because that didn't happen. Yet.

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haidy1411's picture
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haidy1411 3 March, 2014 - 23:49

I don't have facebook because i think it is a waste of time you put your picture and people stare at you see what you wear how you smile,stand......... ,and it also can get you troubles if you added a stranger

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dzeni's picture
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dzeni 3 March, 2014 - 17:59

I don`t have a Facebook. My friends always ask me why. I don`t like sharing my pictures with other people and wait what they will say about my style, my face or something other. I prefer to see people and talk to them in real life.

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AnD's picture
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AnD 3 March, 2014 - 14:39

Yes, I have Facebook. I have been deleted many times, by people, who were really precious to me, though we almost never met in real life. I know that it's offencive, that's why I never delete my friends on Facebook.

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Oliii98's picture
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Oliii98 2 March, 2014 - 20:43

I don't have facebook, and I don't want to have it. It is waste of time for me. When I look at all these fotos published by teenagers I want to laugh. I can't understand why people want to share their private information, even to strangers, tell about everything they do, even if it doesn't count for anyone. I don't say everyone does like this, but anyway I don't like facebook and I can live without it :)

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Younique's picture
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Younique 2 March, 2014 - 08:07

Facebook isn't the real life, so I think deleting some unnecessary friends on Facebook is acceptable :)) I've deleted some of my friends on Facebook.

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MALINE's picture
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MALINE 28 February, 2014 - 16:42

Yes,I have delated some "friends" on facebook and I don´t think that´s rude I just stay in touch with my real friends but that leads to another question why do we bother to make friends if eventually we´ll delated them?
I think is due to popularity but that´s not a good idea because at the end of the day you don´t know who you are welcoming to your life.

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Niluh's picture
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Niluh 26 February, 2014 - 10:19

Yes, recently i have deleted many of friends in my Facebook. When Facebook was very popular in my country, i made lots of accounts on it and looked for new friends all the time. Now, i only have one account on Facebook, i have deleted another accounts of mine and deleted many "strange friends" from my real account, it's better to have a little friends on social media i think. I will think twice when accepting stranger to be my friend, deleting or adding friends on Facebook is privacy and there is nothing wrong with it.

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Harabeli Supersweet's picture
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Harabeli Supersweet 25 February, 2014 - 17:17

I don't have a Facebook profile. I prefer using sites that are not so popular in my country. I use YouTube. I have deleted friends. One of my real life friends used to bother me a lot, so I deleted her. There's nothing wrong with it. And I don't like the way people pretend to be so social, so lovely with everyone on the internet, when in real life they don't even talk.

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justcricketforme's picture
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justcricketforme 25 February, 2014 - 10:12

I have deleted every friend I don't know after celebrating "Safer Internet Day". Now only my real life friends are my friends. No, no one ever deleted me.

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